Confidence and the aspiring singer.

​Recently I was working with a young student whose faith in themselves was minimal at best. I know that for new singers, singing in front of others, especially voice teachers can be very daunting. I work hard to make sure my students feel safe, supported and valued. I do not EVER tell someone they can’t sing, because I don’t believe that. All I focus on is the potential, and everyone has potential.

This lovely student was singing through a song I had never heard them sing and stopped themselves at a certain point in the song. They said, ‘I can’t sing this bit,’ and tears welled in their eyes. I’m sure you understand how vulnerable it can be, firstly to sing but also to connect to a song emotionally, thus making yourself even more vulnerable.

I had never heard them sing this song, I didn’t know if they could or couldn’t sing the part, all I could see was their self-doubt and fear and honestly maybe even a little shame. I encouraged them to continue. They picked the song back up, and it was beautiful.
 
Now why did this moment happen? Maybe they just felt shaky in this section of the song? Maybe their throat felt tight? Maybe their larynx was too high? Maybe they were singing over a break in their voice? Maybe they just didn’t like the sound of their voice in this section? Maybe all of the above? OR just maybe someone who had heard them sing this song before had told them that it didn’t sound good. Guess which one it was?

So now as I work with this beautiful person and their voice, I need to undo the damage of someone else’s opinion (a completely invalid one at that) I need rebuild their confidence and help them reach their highest potential. I want them to know how amazing they are, I want all my students to see how brilliant they are all in their own unique ways.
 
When I was a very young singer, before voice lessons, I asked someone,
​
'Do I sound good or am I just loud?’ They said I was, ‘Just loud’ I laugh now because I am loud, ask any audio engineer I have worked with! But imagine if I had listened to that person and stopped? I wouldn’t have lived my life exploring my passion. I wouldn’t be helping others do the same. I wouldn’t have lived my life filled with the joy of performing, recording, writing and singing.

​The point is, don’t do this. You know the old saying:
 
‘If you don’t have something nice to say, say nothing,’
 
No one has the right to squash someone else’s joy, to mess with their confidence, their dreams. Just get busy living your own life. An aspiring singer might only want to get better at singing in the shower or they may want to sing to their spouse for their birthday or maybe kill it at karaoke and that is bloody brilliant!
 
If you want someone in your corner supporting you and cheering you on, then reach out.
 
I’m here to help.

One of my first headshots. :)